How This is Going to Happen

I had a feeling that my first blog post should outline the rest of the blog posts to follow.  The blogs will probably have the continuity of Miami Vice, the attention span of Family Guy, and the humor of Eddie Izzard.  If you have not seen the stand-up comedy of Eddie Izzard then you obviously have no taste in comedians or you live in a hollow and empty world of pain.  I will probably be posting (mostly) reviews of restaurants, books, or films overflowing with cynicism, sarcasm, and historical comparisons out the bum.  I will probably use profanity and be overly passionate at times, but I will most be as cool, calm, and collected as Frank Sinatra on a burn run.

Tonight I will begin only by presenting the prettiest picture I have from my brief visit to Antwerp in 2012.  I may post my photography often, because this blog, photography, and living the life that some people only dream of are just a few of my plans for the “Awesome Summer That Will Be in 2013”.  Skaggs (my big sis) and I have 3 main objectives for the summer and they are as follows: 1) Workouts. 2) Tans. 2) Raybans.  Everything else falls beneath those in importance.  So I am hoping to write my second blog entry soon and hopefully I will be writing about that big, dumb mythological ox Hercules and translating superfluous language from intelligent people into twenty-something language for my generation to comprehend and find really hilarious.  If I do not decide to talk about the big, bad and brainless Hercules then I will probably focus on my favorite epic The Odyssey by that classy Greek guy Homer.  Odysseus is just a frat boy who shows up to parties to say he was there and not because he totally wants to be there (he’s definitely cool with the free ass in case anyone’s wandering) while his Miss America 4.0 girlfriend is studying and believes he’s playing football with his friends.  Why do I like Odysseus?  Because Achilles is a whiny dick.

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